Expression écrite

[alpha000000]

Bonjour, 

Je dois rédiger un article en anglais sur une rencontre avec un hacker, avec un "Anonymous" pour être plus précis. Je ne sais pas s'il y a des fautes et si oui, pourriez-vous me les signaler ? 

December 2020. 9 PM. John, a false name that we will use in this article to preserve his identity, was already there. We chose this place a few days earlier, on Twitter. It is our first meeting, and John has already told me that it will be the last and that he will not answer my next messages, if I would try to contact him again.

I investigated on the group Anonymous for a long time, about 6 months of difficult work. Indeed, it was difficult for me, as a beginner in Anonymous, to know that if the person with whom I talked is a real Anonymous or not, if she is opposed to the journalists, what she does, did, will do, what is her level of involvement in the actions of Anonymous … I talked with a lot of people, a majority of them do not accept an interview but one of them, John, after longs talks, and after making sure that he is involved in the Anonymous, finally accepted the appointment which I offered to him. 

So, we met us for this interview. My first question was : 

“Why and how are you become an Anonymous ?”                                                                

“ I don't consider myself like an Anonymous, I imagine myself like a protector of freedom, especially one of expression, online or in reality. Actually, I am more a hacktivist than an Anonymous for me.” John answered.                                                                                                                              

“ And why not ? ” I added.                                                                                       

“Because, as you probably know, there's no leader of the Anonymous, everyone is quite independent”

Then, I asked John about his goals and his motivations, and John told me that he wanted to put up a fight and to stand up against powerful governments, enterprises … who try to spy people, to hide compromising data to the global population. He admitted too that some of the persons with whom he works ambitioned to reveal secrets. I tried to make the reconciliation with Julian Assange, who is the founder of Wikileaks, a website that exposes confidential documents, to the global population. Quickly, John blurted out that he is not affiliated to this man, but he confessed that he agrees with Assange on behalf of the freedom of expression. 

Finally, I asked him this question :                                       

  “Who inspired you to become a hacktivist ?”                      

“Well, when I saw that even the President of United States, and more particularly the President Nixon, which is elected to protect the american population, so its own population, is lying to this people, I understood that the current system isn’t reliable and that I need to fight against it”

After this question, we left. Now, I understand better the philosophy of Anonymous, and most particularly the philosophy of his members. But, like John said, every member is independant, and so has his opinions. 

 

[Michael B.]

Bonjour,

Excuse ma franchise, ce n'est pas dans mes habitudes mais je dois t'avouer que c'est assez compliqué à corriger. Il y a tout de même beaucoup de fautes et d'incohérences. Le problème, c'est que si je dois réellement corriger ce texte, je dois alors en changer les tournures. Ce serait laborieux... 

Je vois que tu es en classe de première, je te conseille d'aller voir ton professeur afin de lui faire part de tes difficultés. Si un de tes camarades a plus d'aisance dans cette matière, tente également de lui demander un coup de main. 

Dans le fond il y a de bonnes idées, mais c'est assez difficile virtuellement de t'expliquer ce qui ne va pas en dehors des erreurs de grammaire.

Bon courage.

[sebinnis]

Je te propose une correction (je ne suis pas prof) :

 

John, a WRONG name that we will use in this article to HIDE his REAL identity, was already there. We chose this place a few days AGO, on Twitter. It is our first meeting, and John has already told me that it will be the last and that he will not answer my next messages, if I would try to contact him again.

I HAVE investigated on the group Anonymous for a long time, about 6 months of HARD work. Indeed, it was difficult for me, as a beginner in Anonymous, to know that if the person with whom I talked TO is a real Anonymous ONE or not, if HE OR she is opposed to the journalists, what HE OR she does, did, will do, what is HIS OR her level of involvement in the actions of Anonymous … I talked TO a lot of people, MOST of them do not accept an interview but one of them, John, after longs talks, and after making sure that he is involved in the Anonymous, finally accepted the appointment which I offered to him. 

So, we met us for this interview. My first question was : 

“Why and how DID you become an Anonymous ?”                                                                

“ I don't FEEL like an Anonymous, I SEE ME AS a protector of freedom, especially one of expression, online or in reality. Actually, I am more a hacktivist than an Anonymous for me.” John answered.                                                                                                                              

“ And why not ? ” I added.                                                                                       

“Because, as you probably know, there's no leader of the Anonymous, everyone is quite independent”

Then, I asked John about his goals and his motivations, and John told me that he wanted to put up a fight and to stand up against powerful governments, enterprises … who try to spy people, to hide compromising data to the global population. He admitted too that some of the persons with whom he works WITH ambitioned to reveal secrets. I tried to make the reconciliation with Julian Assange, who is the founder of Wikileaks, a website that exposes confidential documents, to the global population. Quickly, John blurted out that he is not affiliated to this man, but he confessed that he agrees with Assange on behalf of the freedom of expression. 

Finally, I asked him this question :                                       

  “Who inspired you to become a hacktivist ?”                      

“Well, when I saw that even the President of United States, and more particularly the President Nixon, WHO is elected to protect the american population, so its own population, is lying to this people, I understood that the current system isn’t reliable and that I need to fight against it”

After this question, we left. Now, I understand better the philosophy of Anonymous, and MORE particularly the philosophy of ITS members. But, like John said, every member is independant, and so has his opinions. 

Modifié le 6 avril 2021 par sebinnis