Aide synthèse Brexit

[Tanuman]

Bonsoir à tous,

Je suis actuellement étudiant en première année de droit.

Je dois réaliser en Anglais une synthèse de 300 mots (330 mots au maximum) sur le thème du Brexit. La professeur a par ailleurs donné comme consigne : "Exprimez votre opinion. Je souhaite évaluer votre compréhension des choses, pas relire mon cours"

Je souhaiterais donc vous soumettre ma synthèse afin que vous puissiez me donner votre avis notamment sur la forme, l'orthographe, la syntaxe. De plus ma synthèse fait actuellement 404 mots, et je ne trouve pas quoi supprimer car tous les éléments que j'ai me semblent essentiel pour la bonne compréhension du Brexit.

Voilà donc la synthèse que j'ai réalisée :

The story of Brexit begins with Cameron’s failed bet. The British are still suffering from the 2008 economic crisis and the austerity policy implemented by David Cameron. So I think David Cameron wanted to find a culprit to get rid of himself, and that culprit is Europe. Another trigger for Brexit is also the rise of the extreme right, including the UKIP. David Cameron is replaced by Theresa May. Pressed by Brussels, the British activated Article 50 of the Treaty on European Union on 29 March 2017 to leave Europe. The trap closes the negotiation is locked in within two years, the Europeans are therefore master of the calendar. Two obstacles will particularly slow down Theresa May, first the early parliamentary elections of June 2017, the vote makes her lose her majority and she must therefore ally with an Irish extremist party the DUP which weighs on all her decisions. The number of cases to be processed for the exit from the EU will also slow it down. The main problem is the border between Northern Ireland, a member of the United Kingdom, and the Republic of Ireland, a member of the EU. If the border is restored, the country is threatened, and if it is left open Northern Ireland will become a gateway for illegal goods to the EU. The only solution is therefore to keep Northern Ireland in the single market until another solution is found, it is the «Backstop». Theresa May resigned and was replaced by Boris Johnson. I think he is overly aggressive in his way of doing things, because members do not agree with him, he uses the threat of the “No Deal”, and he suspends parliamentary activity, an illegal decision. On October 17, 2019, the 27 and the United Kingdom find common ground. MP’s call for a further postponement of the Brexit to consider the agreement. Johnson agreed but provided that parliamentary elections were held. On December 12, 2019, Boris Johnson won the elections massively and obtained the most comfortable majority since Margaret Thatcher. I think Jeremy Corbyn made a mistake not positioning himself on Brexit, because several polls have shown that the issue of Brexit has become more important than their loyalty to a political party. On 31 January 2020, the United Kingdom finally leaves the European Union. The UK is now in a transition phase and is still aligned with European standards until 31 December 2020.

Merci par avance pour l'aide que vous pourrez m'apporter.

[Jean B]

Bonjour et bienvenue sur e-bahut,

Selon ma vieille habitude, je vais lire attentivement ton texte et y ajouter mes commentaires et/ou interrogations et/ou corrections.

The story of Brexit begins with Cameron’s failed bet. The British are still suffering from the 2008 economic crisis and the austerity policy implemented by David Cameron. So I think David Cameron wanted to find a culprit to get rid of himself, <pour se supprimer ? Qu'as-tu voulu dire ? and that culprit is Europe. Another trigger for Brexit is also the rise of the extreme right, including the UKIP. David Cameron is replaced by Theresa May. Pressed by Brussels, the British activated Article 50 of the Treaty on European Union on 29 March 2017 to leave Europe. The trap closes the negotiation is locked in within two years, the Europeans are therefore master of the calendar. Two obstacles will particularly slow down Theresa May, first the early parliamentary elections of June 2017, the vote makes her lose her majority and she must therefore ally with an Irish extremist party the DUP which weighs on all her decisions. The number of cases to be processed for the exit from the EU will also slow it down. The main problem is the border between Northern Ireland, a member of the United Kingdom, and the Republic of Ireland, a member of the EU. If the border is restored, the country is threatened, and if it is left open Northern Ireland will become a gateway for illegal goods to the EU. The only solution is therefore to keep Northern Ireland in the single market until another solution is found, it is the «Backstop». Theresa May resigned and was replaced by Boris Johnson. I think he is overly aggressive in his way of doing things because members do not agree with him, he uses the threat of the “No Deal” and he suspends parliamentary activity, an illegal decision. On October 17, 2019, the 27 and the United Kingdom find common ground. MP’s call for a further postponement of the Brexit to consider the agreement. Johnson agreed but provided that parliamentary elections were held. On December 12, 2019, Boris Johnson won the elections massively and obtained the most comfortable majority since Margaret Thatcher. I think Jeremy Corbyn made a mistake not positioning himself on Brexit, because several polls have shown that the issue of Brexit has become more important than their loyalty to a political party. On 31 January 2020, the United Kingdom finally leaves the European Union. The UK is now in a transition phase and is still aligned with European standards until 31 December 2020.

Ce qui me gêne, c'est ton emploi des temps verbaux où tu mélanges allègrement présent, present perfect et prétérit. Comme tu fais le récit d'un évènement passé, il semblerait logique d'employer le prétérit partout.  Au plaisir de te relire.

[Tanuman]

Hello !

Merci de ta réponse !

  Le 22/11/2020 à 15:54, JRB a dit :

to get rid of himself

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Ici j'ai voulu dire "pour se dédouaner"

  Le 22/11/2020 à 15:54, JRB a dit :

Ce qui me gêne, c'est ton emploi des temps verbaux où tu mélanges allègrement présent, present perfect et prétérit. Comme tu fais le récit d'un évènement passé, il semblerait logique d'employer le prétérit partout.  Au plaisir de te relire.

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Je vois, mais je ne sais pas vraiment comment je pourrai corriger cela ?

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

  Le 22/11/2020 à 23:27, Tanuman a dit :

Ici j'ai voulu dire "pour se dédouaner"

Je vois, mais je ne sais pas vraiment comment je pourrai corriger cela ?

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Bonjour,

Je vais m'efforcer de te répondre par  MP avant la fin de cette journée.

[Tanuman]

Merci !!!