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Bonjour à tous alors voilà nous avons eu un texte à lire et on doit continuer (inventer )la suite, et ce  qui se passe cette nuit là (en anglais), merci e m'aider : voici le texte :

No one heard my prayers. Kavita closes her eyes and her body shudders with silent tears. She leans forward, seizes the midwife's hand, and whispers "Daiji (=Sage femme en hindi), don't tell anyone. Go quickly , fetch Rupa (=Kavita's sister) , and bring her here. No one, you hear ?"

"Yes, my child. Blessings to you and your baby. You rest now, please. I will bring some food". The midwife steps outside into the might.

As the early light of dawn seeps into the hut, Kavita awakens and feels the throbbing ache in her pelvis. She shifts her body, and her gaze falls upond the newborn sleeping peacefully beside her.

It is not long before the door creaks open and bright sunlight spills in. Jasu enters, his eyes gleaming. "Whe is he?" He beckons playfully with his hands. " Where is my little prince? Come, come... Let me see him!" He walks toward her, arms outstretched.

Kavita stiffens. She clutches the baby to her chest and tries to sit up. "She is here. Youre little princess is right here". She sees blackness cloud his eyes. Her arms tremble as she wraps them tightly aroud the baby, shielding her small body.

"Another girl? What is the matter with you? Let me see!" he shouts.

"No. I will not. You are not taking her". She hears the shrillness of her voice, feels the tension flood into her limbs. "This is my baby, our baby, and I will not let you take her". She sees bewilderment in his eyes as they search her face for some understanding. She has newer spoken to anyone, let alone her husband, with such defiance.

He takes a few steps toward her, then his face softens and he falls to his knees next to her. "Look, Kavita, you know we can't keep this baby. We need a boy to help us in the fields. As it is, we can hardly afford one child, how can we have two? My cousin's daughter is twenty-three and still not married, because he can't come up with the dowry. We are not a rich family, Kavita. You know we can't do this".

Her eyes fill again with tears, and she shakes her head until the spill out. Her breath becomes ragged. She squeezes her eyes closed for several breaths. When she opens them again, she looks squarely at her husband. "I won't let you take her this time. I won't. If you try, if you even try, you will to kill me first."

"Kavita, come, you're not thinking straight, We can't do this."

He throws his hands in the air. "She will become a burden to us, a drain on your family. Is that what you want?" He stands, towering over her again.

Her mouth is dry. She stumbles over the words she has not quite allowed to form except in the distant corners of her mind. "Give me one night. Juste one night with my child. You can comme fetch her tomorrow."

Jasu remains silent, looking down at his feet.

"Please"

(Le gras n'est pas à prendre en compte)

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  • E-Bahut

Bonjour,

Aider quelqu'un ici ne consiste pas à faire tout le travail à sa place.

Si tu ne l'as pas déjà fait, je t'invite à lire ceci : https://www.e-bahut.com/topic/52233-utilisation-et-utilité-du-forum/ et en particulier les 2 lignes en rouge.

>> Néanmoins, quelle peut bien être la suite ?

>> Dans l'Inde des castes, quelles sont les moeurs dans le milieu paysan ?

>> La mère va-t-elle réussir à garder son bébé fille ?

>> Si la réponse est non, que va-t-il advenir du bébé ?

>> Demande-toi ce qu'il a bien pu advenir de la première fille de ce couple.

>> Pourquoi le père a-t-il tant besoin d'un fils ?

>> Après ce travail de recherche préparatoire, tu devrais trouver facilement à inventer la suite du récit.

Au plaisir de te lire et, éventuellement, de te corriger.

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voici ce que j'ai fait pour le début du début , ce n'est rien encore, merci de me corriger :

"Please," Kavita closed her eyes and her body collapsed, then she took a deep breath and began to think that she could this time, yes this time she could escape. She waited for Jasu to leave so that she could quickly get up from bed despite the pain of childbirth; and took her baby in her arms. She joined Rupa who was waiting by the door in secret. "Rupa, you must help me," Kavita exclaimed, "I know, don't worry, the midwife warned me," Rupa replied.

 

 

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  • E-Bahut

voici ce que j'ai fait pour le début du début , ce n'est rien encore, merci de me corriger :

Tu ne dis rien des exigences de ton professeur pour la suite de ce récit quant à sa longueur ou au nombre de mots à utiliser ?

"Please"

Kavita closed her eyes and her body collapsed, then she took a deep breath and began to think that she could escape this time, yes this time she could escape. She waited for Jasu to leave so that she could quickly get up from bed despite the childbirth pains of childbirth; and took her baby in her arms. She joined Rupa who was waiting by the door in secret.

"Rupa, you must help me," Kavita exclaimed.

"I know, don't worry, the midwife warned me," Rupa replied.

C'est un bon début, je trouve, et ton anglais est très correct.

 

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voici la suite :

You understand, I have to run away now, I don't want to leave my baby to Jasu, she will die like all the others and that I can't accept anymore. I won't let it happen again, I refuse even if I'm very scared right now I won't go back. So please help me." I don't know," Rupa replied. "Okay, well, I'm going to our parents' house, they'll probably help me," Kavita said. "Do you really believe that? Remember, for your dowry and wedding expenses they had to pay a lot of money, and hate you because of it, and now you want them to take care of you and your baby, impossible it would be a huge financial burden for them. The best thing would be to put your baby in an orphanage," Rupa replied.
"What? But I won't see her again," exclaimed Kavita.
"Yes, but at least she won't die and then I think you can see her from time to time, let's go! "Rupa replied
Thus Kavita, her baby and Rupa quickly left to find the person in charge of the orphanage. 

"Hello Priyaka (the name of the director of the orhelinate), I came with my sister for her baby" explained Rupa
"Hello, yes, I understand, it's much better than using these methods of infanticide; where these poor babies are strangled, suffocated, it's horrible; but today I hope that's going to change and as proof: many women come here not to have to kill their babies but to give them a chance to live" replied Priyaka
"I have no choice, I would have liked to run away with my baby and live my life; no longer have to live with Jasu. Please find me a solution, I can't live without my baby," Kavita exclaimed.

 

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Kavita exclaimed crying.

"I see, it hurts me a lot. But I have no other solutions, nothing else can be done; it's horrible but that's how our country works," Priyaka replied

"Go give him your baby before someone sees us," Rupa replied, pressing Kavita.

"Here," Kavita replied as she kissed her baby, and hugged him, "I hope you will live a wonderful life, and that you will think of your mother who loves you very much, I'll come back later; don't cry, okay? "Kavita hugged her baby one last time and reluctantly gave it to Priyaka
"Thank you and don't worry, I'll take care of her as if she were my daughter," Priyaka replied, tears in her eyes as she watches a mother separate from her child.
"Goodbye" exclaimed Kavita and Rupa. Then when they arrived at Kavita's house, they saw Jasu pissed off and going in circles. 
When he saw Kavita, he rushed towards her: "Where were you? You wanted to run away, didn't you? You laughed at me," Jasu exclaimed.
"No, it's not that, I didn't want you to kill my baby yourself, so I did it myself," replied Kavita, who at that moment thought that yes, she had like killing her baby by abandoning it.
Jasu surprised replied: "All right it's better like that but you had to warn me, this is the last time, and also the last time you give me a girl, next time it must be a boy understood? "
Kavita nodded and understood at that moment that nothing would change but when she saw her sister, a ray of hope appeared, she understood that if she wanted to resist, work for her baby; and therefore be able to flee far from there, to another country, but without anyone knowing it; it will take patience but no longer for long because she had help now.

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voici la suite :

You understand, I have to run away now, I don't want to leave my baby to Jasu, she will die like all the others and that I can't accept anymore I can no longer accept it. I won't let it happen again, I refuse even if I'm very scared right now, I won't go back. So please help me.

" I don't know," Rupa replied.

"Okay, well, I'm going to our parents' house, they'll probably help me," Kavita said.

"Do you really believe that? Remember, for your dowry and wedding expenses they had to pay a lot of money for your dowry and wedding expenses and they hate you because of it, and now you want them to take care of you and your baby, impossible it would be a huge financial burden for them. The best thing would be to put your baby in an orphanage," Rupa replied.
"What? But I won't see her again," Kavita exclaimed. <(*)> Pas d'inversion sujet-verbe dans le dialogue anglais.
"Yes, but at least she won't die and then I think you can see her from time to time, let's go! "Rupa replied
Thus Kavita, her baby and Rupa quickly left to find the person in charge of the orphanage. 

"Hello Priyaka (the name of the director of the orhelinate orphanage), I came with my sister for her baby" Rupa explained. <(*)> idem
"Hello, yes, I understand, it's much better than using these methods of infanticide where when these poor babies are strangled, suffocated, it's horrible; but today I hope that's going to change and as proof: to prove it many women come here not to have to kill their babies but to give them a chance to live" Priyaka replied. <(*)> encore !
"I have no choice, I would have liked to run away with my baby and live my life; no longer have to live with Jasu. Please help me find me a solution, I can't live without my baby," Kavita exclaimed crying in tears.

"I see, it hurts me a lot. But I have no other solution, nothing else can be done; it's horrible but that's how our country works," Priyaka replied.

"Go give him your baby before someone sees us," Rupa replied, urging/pressing/hurrying Kavita up.

"Here," Kavita replied as she kissed her baby and hugged him her, "I hope you will live a wonderful life, and that you will think of your mother who loves you very much, I'll come back later; don't cry, okay? "Kavita hugged her baby one last time and reluctantly gave held it out to Priyaka. < Méfie-toi toujours de la traduction littérale, le dictionnaire existe pour vérifier !
"Thank you and don't worry, I'll take care of her as if she were my daughter," Priyaka replied, tears in her eyes as she watches a mother separate part from her child.
"Goodbye" Kavita and Rupa exclaimed.<(*)> encore Then when they arrived at Kavita's house, they saw Jasu pissed off and going in circles. 
When he saw Kavita, he rushed towards her:

"Where were you? You wanted to run away, didn't you? You laughed at me," Jasu exclaimed.
"No, it's not that, I didn't want you to kill my baby yourself, so I did it myself," Kavita replied, <(*)> encore who at that moment thought that yes, it was as if she had like killing killed her baby by abandoning it.
Jasu surprised replied: "All right it's better like that but you had to should've warned me, <(= ...tu aurais dû m'avertir) this is the last time, and also the last time you give me a girl, next time it must be a boy, understood? "
Kavita nodded and understood at that moment that nothing would change but when she saw her sister, a ray of hope appeared. Nouvelle phrase> She understood that if she wanted to resist she would have to work for her baby and therefore be able to flee far from there, to another country, but without anyone knowing it. Nouvelle phrase> It sure will would take patience long but no longer for long not so long in fact because she had help now.

De toute évidence, tu as écrit cet texte d'abord en français avant de le "traduire ".

Sache que c'est la pire méthode qui soit même si tu t'en sors très honorablement.

Au contraire et même si cela te demande du travail suppémentaire, efforce-toi de penser et d'écrire directement en anglais.

Avec de la pratique soutenue, tu constateras vite que ton anglais "sonnera" beaucoup plus authentique.

Cheerio!

PS Si tu es curieuse, ce dont je ne doute pas, je t'invite à lire le roman d'où est tiré ce passage :

La fille secrète (Secret daughter) de Shilpi Somaya Gowda

Trad. de l'anglais (Inde) par Josette Chicheportiche

Collection Folio (n° 5477), Gallimard

Parution : 11-10-2012

 

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