Ameliorer Oral Bac Terminale

[well56]

Bonsoir, je suis en terminale et je dois présenter pour lundi ma notion myths et heroes. Ayant quelques difficultés dans cette matière j'aurais aimé que quelqu'un m'aide pour améliorer mon oral et pour les fautes..

Merci beaucoup !

'm going to speak about the notion myth and heroes. A myth is a traditional story, concerning the early history of people or explaining a natural or social phenomenon. It's in this context that it is possible to state that the famous American dream is a myths and probably the reason of the immigration of twenty million people between 1892 and 1954 Those people came from different countries and the majority of them hoped to fulfilled their dreams. Nowadays, we can observe that request for get the American nationality don't stop to poor in. Can we said that America is the land where dreams come true?

I The origin of the American Dream

a) The story of the Pilgrims

B) Why do they embody the American Dream ? / What sort of values did they bring?

First of all, we must explain the origin of the American Dream with the story of the Pilgrims. English were obliged to leave England 400years ago because of religious persecutions.

They travelled across the sea in rough conditions and reach Massachusetts in november so as the result many of them died.

Fortunately, They were rescued by an Indian tribe called Wampanog who taught them how to grow crops ans that's how the pilgrims survived.

They embody the American dream

- a few days before landing, the mayflower compact which was signed by all passenger and remains until today one of sources of the American democracy.

-were deeply religious and brought with them their sense of honor as they struggled to obtain liberty of conscience, religious, liberty.

II- America, the land of milk and honey

a) The immigrants' vision of America.

Secondly, America is the land of milk and honey.

-Already at the time America is the land of freedom and democracy

-Futhermore, the song wrote by Bruce Springsteen in 2012 denounce the partial vision of the immigrants.

-For them America is the hopefulness to lead a better life as they think that America is

land of wealthy and luxury where everything is possible if you are determined to achieve your goal and enrich.→ new Eldorado

B) Lots of icons contribute to promote positive images of the country/Who are the icons who contribute to promoting

Then,

Some artist like promoted positive images of the USA.

- Especially Peter Pismestrovic in his cartoon Dreamland published 1954

-The places, things and people seen in the cartoon were the embodiment of the American way of life and present America like

land of plenty (Coca-Cola, McDonald’s),

a land of freedom (Lady Liberty),

a land of achievement (The Empire State Building, Mount Rushmore),

a land of entertainment (Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, John Wayne, Mickey Mouse)

→ These images are at the same time attractive, conventional, truthful and idealized images.

c) What's does imply their expectations ? What does it imply about their expectations?

Next, we can ask What's does imply the expectations of the immigrants?

Already,

By emmigrating some Immigrants expected to

- feel safer and have more rights

- hoped to be treated and seen equally.

In fact, What immigrants would like the best is to become well-off, climb the rungs of social ladder.

- For other, it was just the mean to lead a simple and happy life with values like faith and equally.

III- When the American dream becomes a nightmare

a ) Some Americans are excluded from the American way. Why?

At last, The American dream could become a nightmare. On the one hand, some American were excluded from the American way.

Bruce Springsteen

- They were determined, work hard but were poor.

- almost all immigrants who belonged to the working class sacrificed their life to build America in dreadful condition at the opposite of their expectation.

/-----

On the other hand The famous famous photograph published in1937 by Margaret Bourke White illustrate perfectly that after flooded who killing 400 people and making 500homeless, the blacks among the population of louisville were especially hard hit by disasters.

-African and american quarter was completely covered with water and had to be assisted by the red cross.

-she manned the photo “the americain way” to show how the American myth differ of the reality.

Conclusion:

To conclude, the American dream begin with the Pilgrims who embody it with lots of positive valued . To finish my oral, I would like to add a quote of st Exupery : "Make your life a dream, and a dream a reality". I show that it illustrate perfectly the expectation of immigrants. Unfortunately because of exclusion, discrimination and the exploitation of the imigrants, the American dreams became a nightmare for some people.

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

C'est certes joli d'écrire un texte bien composé mais tu perds simplement de vue l'essentiel, à savoir que le jour de l'oral tu ne vas pas lire ni réciter quoi que ce soit mais parler. Et ça fait une sacrée différence.

I'm going to speak about the notion myth and heroes. A myth is a traditional story, concerning the early history of people or explaining a natural or social phenomenon. It's in this context that it is possible to state that the famous American dream is a myths and probably the reason of the immigration of twenty million people between 1892 and 1954 Those people came from different countries and the majority of them hoped to fulfilled their dreams.<Base Verbale après to Nowadays, we can observe that people's requests for getting the American nationality / don't stop to pouring in / keep on pouring in. < for + nom ou nom verbal (v-ing), jamais for + BV Can we said say that America is the land where dreams come true?<Un modal est toujours suivi de BV, TOUJOURS. C'est une règle absolue et, soit dit en passant, élémentaire.

I The origin of the American Dream

a) The story of the Pilgrims

b) Why do they embody the American Dream ? / What sort of values did they bring?

First of all, we must explain the origin of the American Dream with the story of the Pilgrims. English people were obliged to leave England 400 years ago because of religious persecutions.

They travelled across the sea in rough conditions and reached Massachusetts in November so as the a result many of them died.<Attention à conserver le temps du récit, c-à-d le preterit.

Fortunately, they were rescued by an Indian tribe called Wampanog who taught them how to grow crops ans that's how the pilgrims survived.

They embody the American dream

- a few days before landing, the Mayflower Compact which was signed by all passenger and remains until today one of the sources of the American democracy.<La relative n'a aucune justification grammaticale, l'indépendante se suffit à elle-même.

- The Pilgrims were deeply religious and brought with them their sense of honor as they struggled to obtain liberty freedom of conscience, religious freedom.<Un sujet est nécessaire, non ? Relis-toi toujours.

II- America, the land of milk and honey

a) The immigrants' vision of America.

Secondly, America is the land of milk and honey.

-Already at the time America is was the land of freedom and democracy <at the time fait référence au passé, non ?

-Futhermore, the song wrote written by Bruce Springsteen in 2012 denounces the partial vision of the immigrants.<Tous les verbes irréguliers doivent être connus par cœur.

-s final au présent simple d'un verbe dont le sujet est au singulier. Si tu ne l'écris pas, tu ne le prononceras pas (-iz) et ton professeur (ou examinateur le jour de l'oral du bac) le remarquera forcément.

-For them America is the hopefulness to lead of leading a better life as they think that America is a land of wealthy and luxury where everything is possible. Nouvelle phrase> If you are determined to achieve your goal and enrich.→ new Eldorado

B) Lots of icons contribute to promote positive images of the country/Who are the icons who contribute to promoting

Then some artists like to promote a positive image of the USA. <Si j'ai bien compris ce que tu souhaitais dire.

- Especially Peter Pismestrovic in his cartoon Dreamland published in 1954

-The places, things and people seen in the cartoon were the embodiment of the American way of life and present America like

land of plenty (Coca-Cola, McDonald’s),

a land of freedom (Lady Liberty),

a land of achievement (The Empire State Building, Mount Rushmore),

a land of entertainment (Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, John Wayne, Mickey Mouse)

→ These images are at the same time attractive, conventional, truthful and idealized images.

c) What's does do imply their expectations imply? What does it imply about their expectations? <Forme interrogative = auxiliaire + sujet + BV Tu l'as appris en sixième !

Next, we can ask the question: What's does do imply the expectations of the immigrants imply?<do ou does selon le nombre du sujet, pluriel ou singulier. Pourrais-tu m'expliquer les raisons de ces lacunes sur des points vraiment élémentaires ? Elles sont d'autant plus dommageables que ton argumentation est bien faite. Alors fais le nécessaire pour les combler au plus vite, ça urge.

Already,

By emigrating some Immigrants expected to

- feel safer and have more rights

- hoped to be treated and seen equally.

In fact, what immigrants would like the best is was to become well-off, climb the rungs steps of the social ladder.

- For To others, it was just the means to lead a simple and happy life with values like faith and equality.

III- When the American dream becomes a nightmare

a ) Some Americans are excluded from the American way. Why?

At last, The American dream could become a nightmare. On the one hand, some Americans were excluded from the American way

Bruce Springsteen

- They were determined, worked hard but were poor.

- almost all immigrants who belonged to the working class sacrificed their lives to build America in dreadful condition at the opposite of contrary to their expectations.

/-----

On the other hand the famous famous photograph published in1937 by Margaret Bourke White perfectly illustrates <L'adverbe devant le verbe that after flooded who the Ohio river flood that killing killed 400 people and making made 500 homeless, the blacks among the population of Louisville were especially hard hit by disasters.

-The Afro-American <? quarter was completely covered with water and had to be assisted by the Red Cross.

-she manned <??? named <? the photo “the American way” to show how the American myth differed of the from reality.<Pas d'article défini devant un nom employé dans la généralité

Conclusion:

To conclude, the American dream begin began with the Pilgrims who embodied it with lots of positive values. To finish my oral presentation, I would like to add a quote of from St Exupéry : "Make your life a dream, and a dream a reality". I show think that it perfectly illustrates the expectation of immigrants. Unfortunately because of exclusion, discrimination and the exploitation of the immigrants, the American dreams became a nightmare for to some people.

[well56]

Je vous remercie vraiment d'avoir pris le temps de lire mon travail grâce a vos explications j'ai pu comprendre mes erreurs.

En réalité pour cet oral, notre professeur nous as donner le plan ci dessus et puis c'est moi après qui l'ai rempli. Sa question" What' does imply their expectations?" me semblait aussi très étrange mais je n'ai pas oser la modifier etant donné que c'est elle qui nous l'avait donné...

Je sais que je fais fréquemment des erreurs au niveau du temps, j'ai vraiment du mal en anglais avec ca.. Mais j'essaye de m’améliorer !

,Merci beaucoup ! Bonne soirée !

[Jean B]

  Le 12/01/2014 à 22:21, well56 a dit :

En réalité pour cet oral, notre professeur nous as donner le plan ci dessus et puis c'est moi après qui l'ai rempli. Sa question" What' does imply their expectations?" me semblait aussi très étrange mais je n'ai pas oser la modifier etant donné que c'est elle qui nous l'avait donné...