Rédaction Sur Les Valeurs (250 Mots)

[CarenHermy]

Bonjour.

Voilà mon sujet : It is easy for people from different communities to agree on values?

Pourriez-vous me dire si mon raisonnement est juste et si vous avez des suggestions afin de l'améliorer, merci de m'en faire part. De plus, je poste également pour vous demander si il est possible de notifier mes fautes sans les corriger s'il vous plait. Merci d'avance.

Thanks to globalization and especially in world cities, people from different ethnic groups tend to mix together. This melting is a contemporary issue we have to face. Living together, they have to agree on values but is this easy for them to do so? I strongly believe this is not and here are the reasons why :

First, values made by communities might be the same such as family, however, they are not led by the same morasl. For instance, family is seen as a traditional value in the USA and more specifically for puritans. Women have an important place in it contrary to some countries in Africa in which they are submitted to many things. That is why this is hard to agree on it: this is a cultural matter above all.

Another value also based on this side is work. In Europe, people try to capitalize to live as well as they can and don't bother with them who have disabilities or difficulties. In African countries, once more, all is different. Everyone works and help people in need in their family. They do have a sense of solidarity that we don't and won't.

In a nutshell, we can believe that agreeing on values for people from different communities is not that easy that it can appear at the first sight. People have to reach a compromise to get on together. Many issues have cultural origins but some don't, like politeness that is a value a bit common everywhere in the world.

Je n'arrive pas à éditer donc je reposte. A la 2ème ligne, au 2ème paragraphe, il s'agit de "morals" et pas "morasl". Voilà

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

Conformément à ton souhait, j'ai juste balisé de rouge ce qui me paraît devoir être corrigé et/ou modifié.

(0) signale une omission à réparer.

Bon travail et à te lire.

PS J'ai édité à ta place et supprimé ton second message après l'avoir fondu dans celui-ci.

Bonjour.

Voilà mon sujet : < It> Is it easy for people from different communities to agree on values? <N'est-ce pas une question ?

Pourriez-vous me dire si mon raisonnement est juste et si vous avez des suggestions afin de l'améliorer, merci de m'en faire part. De plus, je poste également pour vous demander si il est possible de notifier mes fautes sans les corriger s'il vous plait. Merci d'avance.

Thanks to globalization and especially in world cities, people from different ethnic groups tend to mix together. This melting is a contemporary issue we have to face. Living together, they have to agree on values but is this easy for them to do so? I strongly believe this is not and here are the reasons why :

First, values made by communities might be the same such as family, however, they are not led by the same morals. For instance, (0) family is seen as a traditional value in the USA and more specifically for puritans. Women have an important place in it contrary to some countries in Africa in which they are submitted to many things. That is why this is hard to agree on it: this is a cultural matter above all.

Another value also based on this side is work. In Europe, people try to capitalize to live as well as they can and don't bother with them who have disabilities or difficulties. In African countries, once more, all is different. Everyone works and help(0) people in need in their family. They do have a sense of solidarity that we don't (0) and won't (0).

In a nutshell, we can believe that agreeing on values for people from different communities is not that easy that it can appear at the first sight. People have to reach a compromise to get on together. Many issues have cultural origins but some don't, like politeness that is a value a bit common everywhere in the world.

Je n'arrive pas à éditer donc je reposte. A la 2ème ligne, au 2ème paragraphe, il s'agit de "morals" et pas "morasl". Voilà

[CarenHermy]

Merci beaucoup pour cette correction.

Voilà ce que j'ai corrigé (en gras). Merci beaucoup de votre aide, surtout quand je vois certaines fautes idiotes, heureusement que je n'ai pas mis ça dans ma copie ^^ !

Thanks to globalization and especially in world cities, people from different ethnic groups tend to mix together. This melting is a contemporary issue we have to face. Living together, they have to agree on values but is this easy for them to do so? I strongly believe that is not and here are the reasons why :

First, values made by communities might be the same such as family, however, they are not led by the same morals. For instance, family (je n'ai pas corrigé car je ne vois pas pourquoi mettre un article alors que je parle de la famille en général) is seen as a traditional value in the USA and more specifically for puritans. Women have an important place in it contrary to some countries in Africa in which they are submitted to many things. That is why this is hard to agree on it: this is a cultural matter above all.

Another value also based on this side is work. In Europe, people try to capitalize to live as well as they can and don’t bother with those who have disabilities or difficulties. In African countries, once more, all is different. Everyone works and helps people in need in their family. They do have a sense of solidarity that we don’t have and won’t have. (est on obligés de répéter "have" ?)

In a nutshell, we can believe that agreeing on values for people from different communities is not as easy as it can appear at first sight. People have to reach a compromise to get on together. Many issues have cultural origins but some don’t, like politeness that is a value a bit common everywhere in the world.

[Jean B]

Merci beaucoup pour cette correction.

Voilà ce que j'ai corrigé (en gras). Merci beaucoup de votre aide, surtout quand je vois certaines fautes idiotes, heureusement que je n'ai pas mis ça dans ma copie ^^ !

Thanks to globalization and especially in world cities, people from different ethnic groups tend to mix together. This melting is a contemporary issue we have to face. Living together, they have to agree on values but is this easy for them to do so? I strongly believe that it is not and here are the reasons why :

First, values made by communities might be the same such as family, however, they are not led by the same morals. For instance, the family (je n'ai pas corrigé car je ne vois pas pourquoi mettre un article alors que je parle de la famille en général. Certes, mais je considère au contraire que le nom family est déterminé par son sens car il désigne une catégorie humaine.) is seen as a traditional value in the USA and more specifically for puritans. Women have an important place in it contrary to some countries in Africa in which they are submitted to many things. That is why this is hard to agree on it: this is a cultural matter above all.

Another value also based on this side is work. In Europe, people try to capitalize to live as well as they can and don't bother with those who have disabilities or difficulties. In African countries, once more, all is different. Everyone works and helps people in need in their family. They do have a sense of solidarity that we don't have and won't have. (est on obligés de répéter "have" ? Honnêtement, je n'en suis plus si sûr mais je pense quand même qu'il est difficile d'en faire l'économie pour la clarté de l'expression.)

In a nutshell, we can believe that agreeing on values for people from different communities is not as easy as it can appear at first sight. People have to reach a compromise to get on together. Many issues have cultural origins but some don't, like politeness that is a value a bit common everywhere in the world.

[CarenHermy]

Merci beaucoup de votre part. C'est très agréable de pouvoir avoir quelqu'un qui puisse repérer nos fautes pour ensuite être capable de les corriger nous-même. Je crois que c'est important de ne pas avoir le travail déjà fait sinon on ne pourra jamais s'auto-corriger. De plus l'accueil est toujours chaleureux et ça fait plaisir ! Merci de nouveau, je vous dirai la note que j'ai eu :p !

[Jean B]

Merci beaucoup de votre part. C'est très agréable de pouvoir avoir quelqu'un qui puisse repérer nos fautes pour ensuite être capable de les corriger nous-même. Je crois que c'est important de ne pas avoir le travail déjà fait sinon on ne pourra jamais s'auto-corriger. De plus l'accueil est toujours chaleureux et ça fait plaisir ! Merci de nouveau, je vous dirai la note que j'ai eu :p !