texte à corriger merci surtout les temps !!!!

[oliverte2001]

Merci a mxtine pour les phrases mais cette fois c'est le texte entier !!!

One day, when I was young, exactly at seven years old, I was sleeping in a bed given by my grandmother when I heard my mother shouting "AC, dash downstairs and come to see me". Even if I was exhausted, I stood up. I have just dreamt that I was playing with lots of animals (or the other sentence : I had just dream that I was playinf with lots of animals) in a farm. It was magic. So, I entered in the kitchen en I discovered on a small cushion, a delightful and tiny black cat. I've never seen such a beautiful cat. My mother said : "It's for your birthday".

She knew that I always wanted an animal to play with. Moreover, I felt my heart soared. It was one of the best moment in/of my life. It was a very good idea.I've never thought that she could me offer a cat. However, she insisted on the fact that I will have to look after it. In spite of that, I was afraid. To a certain extent, I had doubts. After all, It was mine, and I knew that It was a big responsability because I was young an It was my first animal. Besides, this cat looked like an other cat I have/had seen in a cartoon at TV.

Ultimately, I think that It was a test that permitted me to grow and become faster an adult

[benji45]

Salut :P

Ca ma l air pas mal sauf dans le dernier paragraphe tu dit me offer je dirais plutot offer me et aussi an other s ecrit attache (another)

[cactusjo]

  Citation

Merci  a mxtine pour les phrases mais cette fois c'est le texte entier  !!!  

One day, when I was young, exactly (at) seven years old, AS I was sleeping in a bed given by my grandmother (when) I heard my mother shouting "AC, dash downstairs and come AND see me". Even if I was exhausted, I stood up AND HURRIED DOWNSTAIRS. I have just dreamt that I was playing with lots of animals (or the other sentence YES : I had just dreamT that I was playinG with lots of animals) in a farm. It was magic. So, I entered (in) the kitchen AND I discovered (on a small cushion), a delightful and tiny black cat on a small cushion. I'D never seen such a beautiful cat BEFORE. My mother said : "It's for your birthday".

She knew that I HAD always wanted an animal to play with. Moreover, I felt my heart soared. It was one of the best moment in/IN  my life. It was a very good idea.I'WOULD HAVE never thought that she could  offer ME SUCH a cat. However, she insisted on the fact that I WOULD have to look after it. In spite of that, I was afraid. To a certain extent, I had doubts. After all, It was mine, and I knew that It was a big responsability because I was young anD It was my first animal(PET). Besides, this cat looked like another cat I had seen in a cartoon ON TV.

Ultimately(?), I THOUGHT  (that) It was a test that WOULS permit ( ALLOW )me to grow and become (faster) an adult

[mxtine]

I have just dreamt that I was playing with lots of animals (or the other sentence : I had just dreamt that I was playing with lots of animals) in a farm. It was magic. So, I entered the kitchen and discovered a delightful and tiny black cat on a small cushion. I've never seen such a beautiful cat. My mother said: "It's for your birthday".

She knew that I ‘ve always wanted an animal to play with. Moreover, I felt my heart soared. It was one of the best moments of my life. It was a very good idea. I've never thought that she could offer me a cat. However, she insisted on the fact that I would have to look after it. In spite of that, I was afraid. To a certain extent, I had doubts. After all, it was mine, and I knew that it was a big responsibility because I was young and that it was my first animal. Besides, this cat looked like another one I had seen in a TV cartoon.

Ultimately, I think it was a test that has allowed me to grow and become

faster an adult.

GOOD LUCK